Count your blessings.

Oh, my...where does the time go.

It's been so long since I've written anything. I have an email inbox full of songs that I intended to write about over the past few months...but never did. Call it a time management problem. The time to write is there...I just haven't managed to actually do it. More than blog neglect, it's been a spiritual neglect as well. No loss of faith, no rejection of the things I believe, more like a long sit on a bench in the park. A long sit may not represent progress forward on a path, but it does give one time to think, and think, and think. The time for thinking is done, I need to start walking again.

I moved back into my house this past week. After a few days of unpacking, slowly, and banging my head on door frames I don't remember banging my head on before, I found my cupboards to be bare and decided to go grocery shopping this afternoon. There is nothing spectacular about grocery shopping. It is a chore most of us do on a fairly regular basis.

I'm not sure how other people who have lost a spouse and/or child experience grocery shopping, but for me it's almost always a bittersweet activity. I see mothers, and sometimes fathers, struggling through the store, with their children in tow, and the frustration is often evident on their face. My heart can't help but long for that struggle. As I stood in line tonight, the woman in front of my was "bellyaching" to the cashier that her young daughter was quite a handful....all I could think was, "count your blessings, lady, count your blessings."

After checking out, I was pushing my cart into the parking lot and the refrain of Count Your Blessings popped into my head...and the tears popped out of my eyes. I was feeling very appreciative that the sun had gone down and the bright lights of the store were behind me, shadowing my face.

The song was a poignant reminder that I, too, need to count my blessings.


When upon life’s billows you are tempest tossed,
When you are discouraged, thinking all is lost,
Count your many blessings, name them one by one,
And it will surprise you what the Lord hath done.

Refrain
Count your blessings, name them one by one,
Count your blessings, see what God hath done!
Count your blessings, name them one by one,
And it will surprise you what the Lord hath done.

Are you ever burdened with a load of care?
Does the cross seem heavy you are called to bear?
Count your many blessings, every doubt will fly,
And you will keep singing as the days go by.

When you look at others with their lands and gold,
Think that Christ has promised you His wealth untold;
Count your many blessings. Wealth can never buy
Your reward in heaven, nor your home on high.

So, amid the conflict whether great or small,
Do not be disheartened, God is over all;
Count your many blessings, angels will attend,
Help and comfort give you to your journey’s end.

As I count my blessings, I try to remind myself that the vast majority of people, including myself, live life, make choices, and choose our words based on the portfolio of our experiences. I also try to remind myself that I would have probably been making the same "bellyaches" had things been different.

Abba, please accept this broken offering. Thank you for reminding me that I am blessed. Help me to see You and be You in the world today.